Hey Friends,
I was pondering upon the subject of ‘worry’, anxiety & stress. Traditionally, worry is traditionally seen as a negative emotion. But my question is ?, Is it possible worry has a positive function and that we just don’t tend to use it well? I came across the work of Physician and researcher Martin L. Rossman who argues that worry is actually an adaptive function to better solve problems and imagine creative solutions. And worrying well is a skill anyone can learn.
I would say that worry is a product of imagination, one of the key mental faculties that separate humans from other living beings. Both worry and imagination are based on remembering things from the past and projecting ourselves into the future. If we didn’t have an imagination, we wouldn’t worry. They’re two sides of the same coin.
Jokingly, I would say that if we could perform a safe “imaginectomy”, we could get rid of worry at the expense of our imagination. So instead of getting rid of our imagination—and thus our creativity—we should try to use it better. Dr Rossman suggest the following model of worry :-
The difference between worry, anxiety, and stress
While worry, anxiety, and stress are closely related, here are important differences to be aware of in order to start worrying well.
- Worry. A repetitive/ruminative form of thinking about the future or the past. Paradoxically, because many of the things we worry about may never happen, or may have not objectively happened, our mind may interpret it in a way that assumes worrying was what prevented the negative event to happen. Worry occurs in the prefrontal cortex—the thinking part of the brain.
- Anxiety. An uncomfortable feeling of fear, apprehension, or dread, often in the gut or chest, accompanied by physical symptoms such as rapid heartbeat and sweating. Anxiety comes from the limbic system, also called the emotional brain.
- Stress. A physical response (fight or flight) to a threat, real or imagined. In our modern life, many threats are imagined, but the stress was designed by nature to ensure our survival. It’s characterised by an adrenaline and cortisol surge and increased blood levels in your muscles.
All of them are not intrinsically bad. For instance, short-term anxiety can be a sign something is not quite right; a symptom you need to listen to in order to bring what causes your anxiety into awareness. Maybe you are uncomfortable with a situation at work, or promotion, or maybe you have been avoiding looking into your finances. Similarly, as a response to a threat, stress is a built-in survival mechanism. If the threat is real, your body getting into stress mode is a good thing to find a quick or possible solutions to the real threat.
On the contrary, both anxiety and stress are bad if they’re either chronic or too intense. A panic attack is a form of acute anxiety which is extremely distressing for people who suffer from it. Chronic stress has a terrible impact on the body and the mind. And the same goes for worry: it can be positive or negative.
Functional Worry -versus – Futile Worry
Worrying well may sound like an paradoxical or antinomy. When I say ‘Functional worry’, I mean worry in a good sense which transalates into anticipates and solves problems. It is functional to worry about certain future events instead of burying your head in the sand. For instance: “I’m worried about whether I’ll be able to pay for my kid’s education” or “I worry I won’t be able to find a good school”—these are valid worries. The main question you can ask yourself to figure out whether a worry is functional or not is: “Is it likely that I could do something about this?”
Futile worry (“bad” worry) is circular, habitual, and almost magical. It doesn’t lead to any solution, and it makes you feel scared, which is not helping since the fear makes it harder for you to use your brain. Mostly, it would fall beyond your circle of competence or influence. Dr Rossman gives an example : “I’m worried the world is going to end in December 2024.” Well, that’s something you may as well put on your “bad” worry list—even if it’d been true, there’s really not much you could have done about it.
Beyond your ability to do something about it, how do you tell the difference in practice?
I think the best way out is to see towards the Serenity Prayer:
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”
It’s a simple mantra to help you separate worries into things you can change and things you cannot change.
Still, If you’re not sure about a specific worry, how do you get more wisdom?
- Talk to people you think are wise. These could be friends, teachers, or people who have helped you navigate complex situations in the past.
- WWJ/B/DL/Y do? What would Jesus, Buddha, the Dalai Lama, or Yoda do? When you don’t have access to a wise friend or teacher, you can use this imaginary technique. We usually don’t struggle to give advice to our friends when they come to us with their worries, but we’re struggling to help ourselves in the same way. What would somebody you imagine is genuinely wise do in this situation?
- Inner wisdom imagery. It may sound strange, but you could even get into a relaxed, meditative state, and imagine you are walking in a garden with a person you consider wise (maybe your wise grandma) and are having a conversation with them. This exercise can help you approach your worries from a place of wisdom.
Worrying well is about tapping into the wisdom of real or imagined people, you can turn your negative worry into a positive one—whether a worry you accept, if the circumstances are out of your control, or one you can take action upon. You can watch the full lecture by Dr Rossman here.
Take good care & enjoy reading your dose of cerebral happiness.
JOE
Do follow the ‘JOE’s Life Skills Lab‘ and get yourself enrolled in my E-Mail Newsletter “SUNDAY RETAZOS” sent exclusively to my subscribers with weekly updates on Mindful Productivity, life lessons and interesting articles, I discover during the Week. I AM SURE YOU DO NOT LIKE TO MISS OUT ON THIS.
Main Image Credit:Photo by Aubree Herrick on Unsplash
Get in touch… — JOE’s LIFE SKILLS LAB/Joe Sehrawat
